I like to refer to myself as an observer. I can be quiet and just look and listen to my surroundings and take note of the actions of others as I do this. It’s quite interesting to sit and people-watch, and I have learned a lot about people in just watching. In today’s world we are usually locked to our devices and we don’t interact as much.
When I was travelling I was always meeting people and people were opening up to me on their life stories. A stranger in the street would approach me, and I was very open to meeting strangers. These strangers seemed to trust me on a level unbeknown to them. I knew on a soul level we’d arranged this meeting. You may question this, but life is like that: we meet people for specific reasons. They seemed to know I could provide an answer to their questions or their dilemma and I usually did.
This is why I went into life coaching many years later after I returned to Australia; because I’d had so much practice overseas helping strangers through listening and hearing what they were saying, and allowing the questions to come to me so I could transfer the questions to them, so they could get their answers for them to heal themselves.
Poem:
“I am the observer, observing life around me, fated meetings, and sacred words mere coincidences – or was it ordained?”
Discover your inner child. Trauma and grief can sway us away from the important things in life and interfere with our happiness. When we are bogged down with grief, guilt and shame, we are in a self-defeatist mode. This can cause us to dig ourselves into a hole in the ground.
Life and its circumstances dictated how I felt. Daily pressures can mount up and get in the way of our happiness. It was time to make a decision: do I continue, or do I do something about it? Because of outside influences on me, I decided no more flitting in and out of dilemmas which I had been for the past six months. Life had been catching up with me; now that I’m writing and publishing, I’ve put myself in some strenuous situations, and I seemed to be making a mountain out of mole hill. I had to stop this behaviour, and it is a behaviour, and one I know I am capable of playing in.
So what is the root cause of this behaviour?
You know what happens when we stop: the old memories come flooding in and we are forced to reflect to heal. I was creating a dilemma to get through a deep unknown secret in me. I didn’t believe in me. Wow, really? I do believe in me. But the truth be known, I didn’t, and to disguise this inner fraction, I put myself in a dilemma of frazzling myself and others, to blame others for my shortcomings. Aha! This is the issue.
I questioned it, and in questioning it, I had some pretty angry moments, and in the silence all was quietly revealed. The answers I had been looking for came to me. Aha! So this is what it’s all about. In the knowing I accepted what was causing me to act that way. In the recognition there came acceptance, and in the acceptance it dissipated.
You see, I got a taste of my own medicine as a spiritual coach. This is how I help my clients to move through something irritating or blocking them or causing them anger. I had to investigate my own inner child through reflection; to help myself recognise what was the issue and accept the outcome, which was fear to move forward.
Was not believing in myself my way of self-sabotaging myself? It took a bit of work to get a breakthrough.
I was life coaching myself. And so now I and my inner child are in a happier place, and things are pretty good and running smoothly. A reprieve until the next inner monster raises its ugly head to send my inner child into another episode of fear. But we can handle what life throws at us; it’s all in the reflection of the past, to move through to the now. Read more about my inner child here
Inner child of mine
‘Inner child of mine you surprise me constantly
With your little whims of yester year
I in the now am content to explore the now and the future.
But you tag along looking over your shoulder
To not let the boogie man get you.
Oh little one how sorry I am
That I can’t cleanse or wash away your fears forever.
Alas we must work in unison
To bring forth the monsters in the chasm of your mind
For a better life for us both
To escape the wheel of incarnation and
Endless returns to this plane of existence.
So little one bring forth to me your fears and
Let me help you to find solace through my understanding
And let’s abolish all the monsters of your days.”
Many people say as they read my book, your life is similar to my life. A lot you experienced, I’ve experienced. We all live a life with many experiences. Experiences can be similar but not the same. This is what unites people through reading books. Even through a particular group our similarities in experiences, visions, perspectives etc. My experiences can give you some aha moments. And will bring in some of your own memories as you read my book.
Books are written to excite, intrigue, shape, and inspire and bring in awareness of how other people have lived. You may even find we are not too far removed from each other’s lives. Reading books can help the reader to understand their own life, to put another’s person’s perspective on an incident and how they coped or handled it can help a reader. The most important message is you’re not alone; other people experience similar issues.
Reading of other people’s life events can be helpful
It’s understanding human nature through other people life experiences. We can educate ourselves on life by reading books. This will help us to trigger something you may need to remember, or inspire us to do something we always wanted to do for our own self.
Maybe you wanted to write a book, you may want to travel and live overseas. You want to start a business or maybe you wanted to learn a new language or about new cultures. Books offer all those interesting ways of learning and living.
Books help us to understand behaviours.
Help us to learn a crafts, or language. Read a book and live in someone else’s shoes for a few days or a month, and then sit back and say, hmm, that book helped me… Read about families, read about trauma and circumstances and how people have not let those traumas and circumstances define them. If you were traumatized as a child, you could find the courage to speak up on your own trauma and pain. A book may help you to rise above your issue.
You have two choices
I had two choices; to suffer and be the victim, or see beauty in my world and rise above it. We all have choices in this world. And it’s up to us. Books can help us to understand life. Many of the experiences that you’ve experienced, other people have experienced too. And there’s something in that; when we feel oh, that person went through what I went through. Because we are a group society, other people’s experiences can be your experiences.
It is kind of like a feeling of, oh, these things happen to others. I’m not alone. And others did experience what I experienced and they move through it and forward. You may even realise oh! I’ve never looked at it that way. Maybe I can look at it through their point of view. And maybe I can learn and maybe I can move forward in my own dilemmas? By reading about other people’s experiences, we can change and grow as a person. So get a book, and read a book. Books hold great knowledge, solutions, ideas and new ways of thinking and doing. Books are wonderful.
If you have discovered something about yourself in a book, feel free to reach out for a free 15 minute consultation to discuss what this means to you.
Childhood perception create our world. I recently had the pleasure of spending time with a family member. We discussed how our childhood perception create our world. We talked about how we each saw each others family. What we saw was not true. Our realities were warped due to what we saw with our eyes. http://www.christinecowin.com
I always saw this family member’s family as affluent and they in turn had seen our family as affluent. However, neither of our families were affluent. We were not poor, but we were not rich. We’d had the advantage of living on our farm rent free.
As a child I had seen the big city riches when I visited this family. These riches were far from a country town’s riches.
What saw was the affluence of living in a big city? In my child’s mind these family members who lived in the big city had advantages. They had the good fortune to participate in social activities of their desire. That made them in my eyes affluent. In my family, we had no such luxuries; because we were so far from town. To go into town to attend any weekly social events or activities was near impossible.
The Child’s Mind
It’s funny how the mind of a child works. Funny how childhood perceptions create our world.
In analyzing what I saw in my other family’s family helped me to understand why I couldn’t enjoy what that other family members could, due to their location. I used my childhood perception to fit in with theirs and my situation.
Hence I had to created lack in me. Due to not being able to fulfill some of my dreams as a child; to do ballet. So to justify it, I had to understand my parent’s reasons why we were living so far from social activities. Dad was a shift worker, and Mum was a non-driver.
So we were forever lacking in the social and cultural sides of life. Which I wanted. This family member was so fortunate to live in the big city and do what I wanted to do. She went to stage shows, that a country people like me, in the 1950’s and 1960’s had no clue existed. A country life in those years was a sheltered life. Causing you to be far removed from the arts.
I was not a country girl who liked to go horse riding or who wanted to attend to the cows. I feel I was a city girl caught up in a country life foreign to me.
Life is Mapped Out
Life is ordained and our path is set from baby till we can make a choice to change it. I had karma with my dad who was on a farm, and that karma had to override my love of the arts buried deep within me, a distant memory from another lifetime. You may scoff at me and say there is no such thing as other lifetimes, and I may refute that and say, there is.
Well, let’s hope I get it right this lifetime to make better choices in my next incarnation. Funny how we all have these childhood perceptions we created as children can create our adult world. Do you know you can still be holding onto those created perceptions and beliefs, unconsciously. It’s not until we get to a point in our lives where we are forced to re-look at our childhood perceptions that created our world and see they aren’t serving us in our immediate adult life. http://www.christinecowin.com/about-me
Childhood Perception can Disrupt our Journey
Has this childhood perception I created my world from blocked my own ability to move forward? To manifest the life I want. Am still unable to think like a city person? Is my childhood perceptions and beliefs I created still in my deep subconscious mind?
Because really, they’re only a childhood perception I created. So, I am looking at city people and perceiving them as affluent? I must be unconsciously perceiving myself as less than a city person? Because I see them as above me with all their city advantages. It’s funny how our mindset can change our destiny. http://www.christineucowinwriter.com/bio
Changing our Mindset
So if I see myself as lesser than, a city person, I’ll always be lesser than them. This childhood perception I created has to go. And I’m so, so glad I’d met up with my city family member to remind me of a childhood perception that created my world then and is now outdated and not true. http://www.christinecowin.com
These books in the My Secret Self-Series are an autobiography of a true account of a life experience.
This story is about a child called Christine and her experiences in her family.
Life is not What it is Supposed to Be
Who knows what type of a family we will be born into. Some of us will have an abusive experience and some of us will be traumatized. And only two percent of the population will have a good family experience.Do you carry trauma? We’re you abused? Are you able to talk about it? Are you unable to express your trauma? Are you ready to open that memory up and deal with it? It takes courage to express this part of your life. And it took Christine until she was forty six. After that her path was set on healing the wound. She faced trauma as a child at the hands of a family member and it is usually a family member or someone close to the family. The consequences these experiences created for her and her family create a story that is said to hold the reader’s attention wondering what will happen next in Christine’s life.
Many people have no memory of their childhood or teens. And that doesn’t imply you had abuse or trauma. However, it’s due to some form of hurt you didn’t want to look at, and you’re decided to forget it.
What are these books about?
People ask what are these books about? What is it’s message? That is sometimes the reader needs to discover them self. We all perceive differently and I feel to if a book is described by a reader to another potential reader it can cause some suggests of how to relate to the book. A book such as an autobiography of a true account of a life experience must be between the reader and the author.
A Child Closes Down
In these incidences a child can close down because of the a traumatic event. One can lose their memory to block out the pain, hurt and shame, etc. This happened to Christine, this is when a part of the child fragments. And fragmentation happens to adults too.
When this happens deep healing needs to take place to recover from these events. If one doesn’t heal the memories will re-surface until faced and dealt with.
For years Christine blocked out an issue she had no idea of. This is the sad fact we close down and block it in our subconscious mind. Then the subconscious mind will put us in fear mode to keep us safe. A true account of a life experience in this autobiography will take you on a journey as Christine unravels her self as she digs deep and brings to the surface her hidden issues to face them and once faced they defuse.
You see, a traumatized person will continue to work in the same patterns and put them self on repeat. And keep bring in the familiar through other people.
In an autobiography of a trues account of a life experience You will in the series encounter her past and her demons that may even be your own demons. See how Christine traveled and bravely faced the foe within and slayed them in this reality.
This book was written to help other’s to understand the depth in which your past can be hidden from you and how that past is affecting your future. You see the trauma doesn’t go away; it can only be hidden in you, and you may not even know it’s happened to you.
2001 was the first time I traveled overseas and I am forty-nine years old I had lived a very sheltered life, married, divorced and studied.
I studied with a college in Australia that allowed me to go to Italy to study and there I remembered I had to go to Turkey to visit it.
I got a train from Rome to the boot of Italy; to the port of Brindisi to catch a ferry boat to Greece and then on to the Island of Samos. I have never traveled and I had no fear. I was on a mission and I was following a calling I had twenty years prior to going to Turkey.
Follow my story on how I will go back and live in Turkey. But what was the lead up to making that decision? I had to go home, but why was Turkey my home?
I spent time in Greece and on the Island of Samos and then I got a barge to Kusadasi, Turkey. We were nearing the port and I ran downstairs. Why did I do that for? As I waited to dock with the smelly cars and their exhaust fumes, again I asked myself – why am I downstairs?
But I would soon found out. When the barge door went down, I felt oh my God I have come home. And as soon as I stepped onto Turkish soil I knew instantly I had come home. I ended up travelling around Turkey on little and big buses like I knew the place, like the back of my hand. I had come home.
Follow my story on how I will go back and live in Turkey. But what was the lead up to making that decision? I had to go home, but why was Turkey my home?
